Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
We need to get me chipped asap
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
