i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
