the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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