I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
