don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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