I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
