Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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