Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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