census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
