He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Michael Bay diarrhea
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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