i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
