playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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