if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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