i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She tied me up with her honor cords...
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
