her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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