ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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