what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
