I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
you would pick up someone in the library
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
