Did you just see the Batmobile???
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
