We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
