Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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