lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
