There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
