They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize