well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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