walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
