do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
