i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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