Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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