Your tits are I can't wait for
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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