what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize