So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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