When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm sobbing to NWA
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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