He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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