Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
