You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
the raccoons are back...
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