im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
