but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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