just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
