Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
