just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize