Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
