the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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