So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
