im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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