I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
