He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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