Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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