Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
