So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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