i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
