We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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