my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
So vagazzling was a success
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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