kristin has been a bad kristin
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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